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Letters from Ama-Kids |
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| Hi Scott, Just FYI, so you can gauge, I just turned 27 in March. My father started Amway right around 1990, when I was about 10. So, I kinda grew up on the products and the whole dream lifestyle. You know, I always had my clothes washed in the detergent, the kitchen was always cleaned with LOC, my teeth were always brushed with Glister, and my pee was always dark yellow from the vitamins :) I respected my father alot, he's a good man, so I was always aware growing up that he was doing the things he was doing for our best interest, so even though I was young, I did my best not to complicate things - and because of that, I grew up always working for his respect and admiration. He was in the Air Force, so we moved around a lot, we had a solid relationship. He was forced to retire from the Air Force in the mid-90s, which more focused his energy into Amway. He found another good paying job, but he definitely ran with Amway, and it was not uncommon to see him for 30 minutes after work, before he would 'drive the miles' until all hours of the night. What's good and bad, is that about this time, my dad's job took us back to Thailand (my mother's native country), and I had a blast living there. My dad stepped back from Amway, as working in Thailand and bringing my mom back there to live was one of his life's goals. The bad part is that Amway was taking off in Thailand at about that time, so my dad got some of my aunts into the business, one of them doing extremely well (Currently, she is a Platinum in Thailand), and he also got his best friend over there into the business(who would end up moving to Australia, where he was one of the first people in the country to get in, and as a result, ended up sponsoring a lot of the USA Amway big wigs for their international businesses, so in essence, became a quick success). At this time, my dad was working for a computer company, and the dot.com bust ended my father's career in Thailand. I was living back in Virginia, having graduated high school from Thailand, earning my Bachelor's here in the states, and at the time was mid-way through my Master's degree program. My dad came back to the states and resettled in Northern Virginia, about 2 hours away from me. His American Amway (now becoming Quixtar) business had pretty much died (although his Thailand/Australia legs were getting huge), but he wanted to build a solid American leg so that, and if I'm saying this correctly, he would have 3 legs which would allow him to go Emerald (and quit his job). Like I said, I really respected my father and decided to pick up the reins and repay him for sending me through college, paying tuition, giving me spending money, etc. So I was going to do Amway, but now it was Quixtar. Because my girlfriend (now fiance) wasn't really all about the network marketing biz, I promised my dad that I would give it a try for a year, and after that step back. Everything about the business is exactly the way you and others have described on your site and all the other related sites. I didn't really want to/try to connect with the people and remained focused on my goal of making my father proud and just working the business. I was able to recruit a number of people based solely on the credibility I had built up with others over the years, and I QUICKLY reached the 1000 pin level (this is while I'm in grad school, no money, single bedroom tiny apartment). My father was ecstatic. Our relationship had never been better. It was about this time when my father (who's life code, taught to me repeatedly was "Don't lie, cheat, or steal.") told me about reporting retail sales. My father described the retail sales rule as nothing important, and that it was ok for me to fudge them (just give out a few XS cans to your friends!). I was naive enough to believe him, and anyways, I was definitely not looking at the NEGATIVE information on the Internet. The reason I bring this up, is because I KNOW my father. When he was telling me to fudge the numbers on this, I could hear something off in his voice. This occurance has always been in the back of my mind. My business was continuing to grow, while my free time and disposable income continued to get smaller and smaller. The meetings were getting monotonous. The functions...geez...they were painful (plus the costs, oh geez). And explaining to new recruits how a church service on Sunday had anything to do with network marketing was making me fudge more and more of the facts. I'd like throw in here that I never did the business because of the money. I thought the whole dream thing was cheesy, I mean, my whole dream was to make my dad proud. That was it. But tools were piling up, the trips to spend time with/see the upline's houses/cars were becoming meaningless to me. I had become disenchanted. It was becoming harder and harder to motivate my current group, and finding new recruits was near impossible (I swore I would never end up in the Barnes and Noble just contacting random strangers, but there I was). I even held an open meeting for my college fraternity (40+ people), which pretty much ended my relationship with those guys (people laughed and not a single person followed up with me). The straw that broke the camel's back was hearing from my girlfriend how much the balance on her credit card had gone up. It had strained our relationship enough. My father had noticed that I had cooled off, and I'm guessing he thought I was just taking a short break, so he less frequently drove down to see me and stopped putting together those Nuts & Bolts meetings for us. During this time, I stumbled across your page and I read EVERYTHING. I read Merchants of Deception in one sitting. I was upset. I read a lot on your page about the cult stuff, and how it was really never a good idea to flat out try to coax someone out of the business and how it was better to let the person come to the decision on their own. I didn't take this advice and bombarded my father. Bad move. Even though I told my dad, who's motta was to never lie, cheat, or steal, about the way he told me to lie about retail sales, and even though I could point him to several places (including the BBB) that retail sales are integral to making a business like Quixtar legal; the sources, in his opinion, were not credible. Of course, I left the business, and gave it one last try to convince my father (who I love dearly) to step back from the business (I could already tell money was becoming more of a problem for him, and the stress from the business not working, on top of his son 'turning against him' wasn't helping). It didn't work. Along with our differing views on the war in Iraq (I, apparently, had instantaneously become a dirty liberal, even though I had consistently voted conservative to this point), our relationship was at the boiling point. The occasion our arguments turned physical, I pulled out and cut the ties I had with my father. Even though we're civil now, we're not the same. It's funny, the thing I thought would push us together (Quixtar) ended up tearing us apart. My dad is still fruitlessly working the business, without my leg (everyone jumped ship when I did), and he's basically back to where he started when he came back to the states. It's too bad. Nowadays, my dad does nothing without his upline's approval, he even takes their advice on how to deal with me. Several times, he's tried to conference call me with one of the big emeralds in Northern Virginia to help set me straight. It's sad really, he's not the same person anymore. Well, I've moved on, I have a good job, just bought my first house, got engaged, and my fiance is half way through her MBA. Things are going good for us; it's too bad my father can't have more of a part in my life, but I've learned to deal with it. All in all, I believe I spent about 16 months in the business between 2003-2004. Fortunately, I've used up the remaining stock of Quixtar items, and am actually using quality products that work now, ZING! I also have a butt-load of tapes/CD's in my closet (90% unopened, because, well, they're all the same and they all suck). Know anyone who needs them? Lastly, I really want to thank you Scott. Leaving Quixtar and embracing the truth really, really, really depressed me (I mean, I grew up on this stuff). I know you've heard it over and over, but man, I was down and out after leaving the business. I just couldn't believe what happened to me. And while I'm still reeling from it and the lost relationships to this day, reading your page and other people's stories have continued to keep lifting me up and up again, back to normal. I'm still holding out for my dad to see the light, but I'm not going to hold my breath, and when he does see it and his 'friends' in Quixtar leave him high and dry, I'll definitely be there to help him out. I wish I could give you more specifics on the money spent and the numbers and such, but honestly, I never understood them. But the products are definitely overpriced and not any better than most products on the market that are much cheaper. And, the whole argument that the products would be cheaper once I was Platinum didn't mean anything to me, because I was more interested in keeping my integrity intact. So anyways, again, thank you. Your site is awesome. Getting screwed in Quixtar, and learning from my mistakes by reading your site and other information has (hopefully) prepared me more to deal with this kind of thing in the future. I'm rooting for you, man. Your page has helped me and countless others. Good luck in the future. Keep fighting the good fight, M. |
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